Sunday, July 31, 2011

Intensifying

Today things are definitely intensifying. I'm so thankful to our faithful Lord for a restful night - Wes and I both feel energized and ready to conquer the day. My pressure waves are growing more intense and..a little different. They feel like menstrual cramp waves in the front one minute and then feel like constipation the next. They are radiating quite close together, though I don't know how regular they are. They seem to vary depending on whether I'm standing or sitting. Hopefully this means that things are progressing, as I continue to feel my pelvis widening and baby's head dropping lower. By the end of yesterday I was using the bathroom every 30 minutes it felt like.
I can feel her head pressing down, though no water bag breaking yet. I did see my mucous plug in the toilet yesterday (sorry for anyone reading this that thinks its too much information!) and am feeling ready.
I know I cannot rush her and she can take the time she needs - our prayer is that she will enter the world peacefully, calm and aware. We'll see if she decides on July or waits until August - today is the deciding day!
In the meantime I'm trying to stay hydrated and am so thankful for Wes - as he's taking amazing care of me! He grilled teriyaki tri-trip, asparagus and rye bread for us last night and it was so delicious! This morning I had a bowl of cheerios with milk and then he toasted me an english muffin and made a chai tea latte. I know I need the nourishment for what's to come, so am focusing on that.
We'll try to get out today and do something that involves walking, though with the almost 90 degrees plus humidity, it'll have to be somewhere indoors.
I so enjoyed my day with him yesterday as he took me to IHOP for breakfast and then we ran errands before walking around OSH and then walking the mall. We came home last night and walked the neighborhood as well - whew! Lots of walking! Last night we settled down to a movie after dinner and then got our full night of sleep. Let's see what today holds in store!

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Final days of preparation

We're in our final days of preparation for baby so I figured I'd document it with photos.
Here's what we're up to in our days of counting down:
My project of cleaning out and reorganizing the pantry before baby arrives....actually before guests arrive who'll likely be cooking for us :) I figured it'd be nice if they had some kind of organized system to go by!
Nursery is pretty well set-up and ready for baby girl!
Wes already installed one carseat in my car and is now working on installing the convertible carseat in his truck.
And finally our front room reflect baby toys and a birthing ball - my seat of choice these days for helping baby's descent :) She's taken over!
With a belly ready to pop, bags packed and ready to go, we're 39 weeks and counting!



Antsy, Irritated and Emotional...

Wow what a roller coaster ride this is turning into! Over the course of the past few days we've figured out that my hormones are going through a change, which has resulted in my breaking down to tears every night over something.
My dreams have been so vivid and odd, mostly including images and people from the past - last night included my getting ready for school (I was in high school) and running late and Katelyn and Brennan getting on me for running late. I hadn't given myself enough time for breakfast or to make a lunch, so planned to stop at Starbucks and pick something up, but knew that Brennan would be upset for making him late to school. It was exam time and I couldn't remember what order my classes went in, so didn't know where to go first. I felt very unprepared and pressured.
I've been listening to my HypnoBabies tracks at night these past few nights and it seems like I'm having birthing waves while I'm sleeping, but not so many while I'm awake. Could it be that my body is doing the preparation work while I sleep and am in hypnosis?
Last night was the first time I felt irritated by the tracks. I played more than one in a row and found myself a bit disoriented when I woke up and they were still playing. That, along with dreaming through listening to my tracks, resulted in a very irritated and uncomfortable Kristen this morning.
*sigh* Of course I can analyze all of this and question whether my body and mind are not quite ready to give birth and perhaps that is why I couldn't handle listening to the Easy First Stage track? Perhaps my subconscious mind is rejecting the suggestion that this is time to give birth because it's not quite time?
Only time will tell!

Friday, July 29, 2011

Birthing time

I think it's safe to say that I've begun my birthing time. This HypnoBabies thing really works, as it is easy and so comfortable so far! My pressure waves (aka contractions) simply feel like waves of pressure radiating from my uterus to my back. I can feel my cervis dilating and the pressure of baby's head gently moving down into my pelvis.
I feel very calm and peaceful - it's almost surreal! I've kept asking myself, is this really happening? Baby has been more active as the pressure waves gently squeeze and massage her.
Last night I had a bit of emotional meltdown - as I realized I was placing a time limit on myself and my birthing by telling people the status of things. From now on I will not be sharing how things are progressing - I want to stay centered and balance in my birthing time. "My job is to simply relax and allow my baby's birth to happen" - one of my favorite quotes from the HypnoBabies tracks.
"My body knows how to give birth" "I will birth beautifully, calmy and peacefully"
I do feel very relaxed and am looking forward to giving birth with confidence.
I am so thankful that God has designed my body to do this and that it is gradually preparing for baby's birth.
Today I have few errands left to run and then I'll be settling in for a nice, relaxing weekend of patiently cooperating with my body during this birthing time.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Checkup with the doctor

I had my 38.5 week checkup with the doctor yesterday and received some exciting news - I am 3 centimeters dilated, my cervix is 70% effaced (or thinned out) and the baby is at -1 station. He encouraged me to take some time with Wes this weekend as it will likely be the last weekend we have as a couple before we become a family. :)
Dr. Tsang clarified what a contraction would feel like - starting with firmness in my abdomen that radiates around to my lower back, where I would feel like I'm constipated. This description helped and I've noticed a few since then. Again, nothing regular.
I've begun to dream the last few nights about giving birth - with last night's dream so vivid that I thought I might actually send myself into my birthing time!
I listened to my birthing day affirmations cd while falling asleep and was so excited about the changes taking place that I didn't fall asleep very easily.
Wes and I have walked everynight for the past few nights and I went and walked 1 mile this morning around Hidden Lake. I feel ready and confident for my daughter's birth and am so thrilled that I finally get to meet her! I'm hoping for this weekend, but know that God's timing is better than my own. While I do have some discomfort - mainly pressure on my symphsis pubis, I am truly anticipating her arrival purely for the sake of the joy.

On another note, I found a group of moms here in Tracy who meet to run a few times each week on meetup.com and I was invited to meet them this morning. (You have to be invited and approved to join the group) So I met up with a few of the women at Tioga Park in Hidden Lakes and got the run-down of how everything works. They meet Tuesdays, Thursdays and Sundays to run and take turns watching one another's children so the other moms can run. They seem like nice people and I am eager to join them once I can run again! This morning I chose to walk(some may say waddle - haha) the 1 mile loop and then I left. These women do races together sometimes and each person can run at their own pace or with a partner. What motivation to get running again after baby is born!

My final thought is that I'm going to begin reading the book "WEiRD", which some people from our church are going through. They'll be doing a 6 week book study, which we cannot commit to of course, but we'll do a study on our own. Since I'll be reading it on my Kindle I figured I'd blog about my thoughts and reflections here, in addition to documenting my experience as a new momma. So that'll give the blog some direction for awhile. Lots going on!

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Preliminary birthing signs

Continuing the countdown and praying that our daughter will come in God's perfect timing...
This past week I've experienced some preliminary signs of birthing as I feel my body changing. About two weeks ago I began to experience some contractions aka birthing waves, which started as aches in my lower back and then lead to what felt like low menstrual cramps in my pelvis. These began the night before we drove to San Francisco airport to visit Wes' sister and her family. I was a bit nervous with that long drive, but told myself that my mind is in control of my body and that I was not going to start my birthing time on that drive...and I didn't!
Since then there have been similar experiences, but nothing regular. Earlier this week after purposefully practicing some induction techniques (walking and...ahem..time with my hubby ;) ) I developed a deep peace and feeling of 'readiness' as well as had my 'nesting instinct' kick in yesterday with a burst of energy and getting a lot of errands done. I also felt some random 'drips' and wondered if perhaps there is a leak in my amniotic sac.
I checked with the nurses at the hospital to verify that my Group B strep test was negative, which it was, and since have not had the feeling of leaking any further.
Today I just rested and relaxed for most of the day, feeling my daughter sink even lower into my pelvis, though no regular birthing waves have come.
I intend to begin listening to my birthing day affirmations tonight as I go to sleep and trust that my body and baby will do what they need to in their own perfect time. After all, once of my favorite sayings is "My job is to simply relax and allow my baby's birth to happen"
I can only give praise to the Lord for this wonderful pregnancy, for designing my body to work perfectly while He alone has formed my daughter, inside and out. I look forward to my birthing time with confidence and assurance that God will guide me through and my body was made for this!

Monday, July 25, 2011

11 day countdown

With 11 days to go until my daughter's due date, I figured now would be a good time to get back into journaling/blogging..if only to record how I'm feeling and how things are going before life changes forever.
Overall this pregnancy has been such a blessing. I have had extremely good health and excellent results with my weight gain, blood pressure, etc. My daughter has continued to grow strong and I love hearing her heartbeat at each doctor's appointment. Her movements are more limited now, as she's in much closer quarters and taking up all of that space. I can hardly wait to meet her!
I've been so blessed that I've been able to stay home and rest and prepare for her birth. Her nursery is ready as is her bathtub and also bassinet in our bedroom. I can't say that there was a certain point when I felt "ready" for her arrival, but I can say that I have such a deep peace and confidence for the upcoming delivery and start of our new lifestyle. I don't feel nervous per se, but am eagerly anticipating bringing her home and caring for her needs..outside of my body. ;)
I look forward to getting to know her little personality, her facial expressions, what her tastes are like, and her schedule. I am so in love with her already and I get choked up thinking about the first time I'll get to see her outside of me. I can only imagine myself crying and being overwhelmed with love.
As far as becoming a mother, I can only rely on God's strength to prepare me and get me through each day. She is, after all, His creation - He knows her inside and out as He is the one who formed her physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. He knows her heart and what will become her passions. I can only press into Him and ask for His guidance in raising her. I so desire for her to be fully restored as His child and live in His abundance. I must surrender her into His hands, even now before she is born, and remember that she belongs to Him.